Sunday, January 20, 2013

pleasure yourself - endorphins are better than crack

here are 5 reasons why endorphins are better than crack.

1.  all natural, baby – no need for nasty chemicals. all you need is sweat. once you’re glistening and glowing, there is no better feeling in the world.

2. cheaper than a 2 bit crack ho – why pay out for something you can get for free, over and over and over. mmm. sounds good,eh? 

3. imminently fuckable…healthy and confident with a voracious appetite for life. that’s way sexier than some scrawny, stringy chick with no teeth, yeah? 

4. way better gear…sleek lycra, bright colours, form-fitting clothes, cool gadgets, great shoes, knee high socks.hahaha. ok maybe not so much – run geek chic is pretty hawt though bc of whose wearing it. what’s not to like? crack junkies only have a skanky, resin-crusted pipe that goes along with the mouth sores…yum. 

5. upward spiral – you work hard, feel strong, look great, feel great and the positivity self-perpetuates. with crack, the only way is down – nothing matters but that one time hit-it consumes you and spits you out.

guilt-free pleasure 
Truly though, we all make choices. I’ve made lots of horrible ones…but sometimes I make a good one and it even sticks…well-the high i get keeps me coming back for more..guilt free.

stimulate yourself 
Incidentally, since you can’t always run or exercise, you don’t have to give up your high. According to Alan Parker, there are five other natural ways to stimulate an endorphin rush:
1. have an orgasm
2. eat spicy food
3. get acupuncture
4. laugh
5. scare yourself

hmmm….i wonder if you can OD on endorphins? i don't think so... well, you'll have to excuse me now, all this pleasuring talk has made me crave...acupunture...? umm no...must be spicy food, yes. that's it. 


  1. I could not agree more! PS love the pic haha

  2. Great fun post. And all true!
    The BEST things about running are the endorphins, the sense of confidence it instills, and the fact that it's FREE!

    I love the stimulate yourself list.